WEIRD THINGS PEOPLE SAY

Not all people and not just anywhere. The book WEIRD THINGS PEOPLE SAY IN BOOKSTORES by Jen Campbell narrows it down for you. Apparently working in a bookstore has a perk I wasn’t aware of: laughing at customers.


Although perhaps it would be better to keep a straight face in the hope of keeping a book buyer. So here goes. Hands at the ready to cover the guffaws.

1. “Do you have any books by Jane Eyre?”

2. “Did Charles Dickens ever write anything fun?”

3. “I’m looking for some books on my kid’s reading list. Do you have ‘Tequila Mockingbird’?”

4. Customer: “Do you have the Dinosaur Cookbook?”
Bookseller: “The Dinah Shore Cookbook?”
Customer: “That must be it. I wondered what she was up to.”

5. “Do you have ‘Fiddler on a Hot Tin Roof’?”

6. “What books should I buy so guests looking at my bookshelf will think, ‘Wow, that guy’s intelligent’?”

7. Customer: “Have you read every single book in here?”
Bookseller: “No, I can’t say I have.”
Customer: “You’re not very good at your job, are you?”

On a more serious note, book news this week is about the 110-year-old library in Philadelphia that’s haunted, the Penguin-Random House merger, and the coming Christmas season Battle of the Tablets starring Apple, Amazon, Google, Microsoft, Barnes & Noble and Samsung (I hope I didn’t miss anyone).

All that on top of a election campaign which spent four billion (with a B) dollars and took three years. I need a nap.